Hello and thank you for calling in...

My name is Helen and I am a Photographer living in England. I started this Blog on the day that my Grandma died, three months after my Father died and several weeks before a third funeral. Initially it was a very personal way to stay connected to the people I'd lost and it helped, it really did. But writing and taking pictures everyday has taken me to places I never dreamed possible and I am now marching into Photography as a full time proffession. A big thank you to my followers, to those who take the time to comment and to new visitors, I hope we will become Blog friends too...

Saturday, 31 December 2011

a new path

When the clock strikes twelve tonight it will be the start of a New Year and a start of a new life for me. Right now all I want to do is go home, back to my life, the one I have known for ten years. I want to walk in the front door when I visit my daughter later, clean my kitchen surfaces, make a drink for my family and sit down on our sofa just like every other Saturday I have had for years. There were so many parts about my family that I loved and so many things about the man I was with that I loved and I always hoped that we would make it, I can't imagine there being no 'us'. But for a while now, the bad bits had outweighed the good and although it is devastating to be without him, to have it fail, I know in the long run it will be for the best. Its such a shame, such a waste when you have given your heart.

So brave face at midnight and I will try my hardest not to cry when all the couples are kissing, I may even leave before that point, I will have to see. The photograph below, I have put on here before but when looking for a picture that symbolises the start to my year, there can't be any other than this one. Taken on a morning, very early, when it was just me alone in the woods with my camera and nature at its most glorious it shows me my future. I will be able to do this thing again that makes me so happy, wandering along with my camera capturing the magic, along my new path.



4 comments:

  1. Good luck on your new path. I hope you find peace and happiness.

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  2. Good luck on your new path. I hope you find peace and happiness.

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  3. Oh Helen, I'd no idea! I'm so sorry things haven't worked out for you and I wish you lots of wonderful new opportunities in 2012. It takes a lot of courage to accept that something isn't working, and then to move on. I had to do it myself about twelve years ago, and if it helps at all, I'm so glad I did - the last twelve years have been some of the best of my life. I hope things will work out wonderfully well for you too, and that your new path is strewn with those glorious rays of light.

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  4. Thank you Leaca, thats very kind of you.

    oh Gilly, how life can change in a heartbeat,right now it doesn't feel like reality but like you say sometimes you have to be true to yourself and have the courage to let go. Thank you so much for your kind wishes, I will look forward to those glorious rays of light!

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